I am the alpha and the omega
June 10, 2004
Campbell's Law
Nature abhors a vacuous experimenter.

Those darling imbeciles at my college have done it again. They have pulled off the wurssscccchhhht gig ever.
It goes something like this.

Remember my rant about my college, about them not giving my Course Completion Certificates. (That was on March 22nd, I think). Well, since my interview is nearing again, I decided it was time to get that same piece of important, but worthless paper again. It WAS with the hope that by this time atleast, they would have finished it now atleast.

Scene 1:
Two days ago (the 8th). I went to my college. To the Academic Section.

Act 1:
In the Academic Section, trying desperately to converse with the lady responsibe for settling all the B.Tech grades.
Me: Can I get my Course Completion Certificate.
She: Sorry, but I dont have all your grades. Your project grades have not yet arrived. Go to the department and talk to them.
Me: Ummm. Ok. Can I get my certificate immediately after that.
She: Sure. It will be given IMMEDIATELY.
I leave to the Department, the mighty department which I have not visited for quite a while.

Act 2
At the department, sitting in front of Professor S., who is responsible for all the B. Tech projects and for sending the grades to the academic section.
Me: Sir, has the project grades come out. (I actually dont know that)
S: Yes. They have come out
Me: Have you sent the grades to the academic section?
S: Yes, I have sent them. Why, are they saying they havent recieved them? But here is the exact sheet that I sent them 5 days back. (Shows me the dusty file, which contains the choiciest tattered pages [were they attacked by the bookworm?]. And yes, that sheet is there. I would rather not reveal the grade).
Me: Ok Sir. I will go to the Academic Section and tell them that.
I walk to the Academic section now. My hopes arent too brite. I am pretty sure something has gotten screwed up.

Act 3
I am at the academic section, standing in front of the same lady.
Me: Ma'am, the project convener has said that he has sent the grades 5 days back.
She: But then, I have not recieved it. Here is a list of grade sheets for all courses recieved from the department. (She hands me a file in a similar tattered condition as above, and a lot of computer sheets. And flips thru it.
Voila, it is not there).
Me: (Convinced that it is not there). Ok Ma'am, I will mail the prof again. (Completely disappointed. And the prof has left, and so I cant contact him personally).

End of Scene 1
Is there some mysterious black hole betweent the department and the academic section that gobbles up everything thrown between them, or is there some snail that carries the documents between them. (It STILL shudnt take that long).
Its like two blind people trying to throw cowdung at each other, and then asking politely whether they hit each other.

Scene 2:
Act 1:
I am back at my college, today (the 10th). At the mentally retarded academic section. In front of that very same lady.
Me: Have the grades come out yet?
She: Yes, here they are. (Shows em on the computer. Pathetic)
Me: (Heaving a sigh of relief). Finally. When can I get my Course Completion Certificate?
She: You can come collect it tomorrow (the 11th). (Aiyyoooo)
Me: And my marksheet?
She: After 2 more weeks. (Aaarrrrrgggghhhh).

End of Scene 2
Finally, my course completion certificate, supposed to come on the 24th of May, coming on the 11th of June, 18 days late.
Speaks volumes of the "IIT Efficiency".

Posted by satosphere at 11:36 AM


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